LimeWire Music Blog

We may have thought, yesterday, that the now three-way Fiery Furnaces-Radiohead-Beck feud instigated by the Furnaces’ Matt Friedberger was over. Instead of whining via publicist or ignoring Friedberger’s random attack, Beck responded by offering a fairly awesome free track called (what else?) “Harry Partch.” All seemed right in the world: Radiohead had kept its silent dignity, Friedberger had been thoroughly PWNED and Beck had made sure the kids at least got something out of the media circus.

But Friedberger, we’ve learned, just doesn’t know how to gracefully accept defeat. He’s already back on his MySpace blog, makin’ trouble. In a post titled, “Imaginary Response!” he writes:

Somebody (he didn’t want his name mentioned (though he did want his new, great band, Circle of Buzzards plugged)) told me that Beck posted a song about Harry Partch on the internet.

A virtual response, therefore.

But doesn’t this imaginary feud demand imaginary responses? And therefore, imaginary response songs? Shouldn’t we step–isn’t now the time to ascend–from the merely virtual to the boldly imaginary?

When I made up my imaginary Radiohead song about Harry Partch (in full knowledge that there was no Radiohead song about Harry Partch, regardless of whatever Dave H. said to people before he talked to me (I love you, Dave)), and was sharply critical of it, I certainly didn’t imagine my endeavors in this regard would engender such a response. How tremendously for the best it has all turned out to be

How fruitful an imaginary song proved in practice! So as we all move forward, shouldn’t we admit that posting songs on the internet–being virtual, in other words–is so last year? So to speak. Isn’t that what every music management company intern from Northeastern recommends that bands do? That can’t be right.

I propose nothing less than the liberation and use of only our imaginations for the direct purpose of, not just pop music writing, but pop music production and distribution. And subsequent, now imaginary, blog discussion.

Won’t these imaginary songs sound sweet? I imagine they will. Think how adaptable to changing tastes and fashions they’ll be. And how many billable hours of intellectual property disputes they’ll cause! This thought-experiment rock is no doubt the breakthrough the industry professionals have been waiting for.

The music industry has already gone to the imaginary model in many respects. Bands–at least smaller bands–only get to make imaginary livings. (To say nothing of bands that imagine they are playing rock music by pressing the space bar on a laptop and hitting a floor tom. I am saying nothing about that.) Of course many fans–and fans are always the most progressive element of the rock music community–have long since gone to the imaginary model. They must really be imagining things to admire the music acts they do.

Let’s all follow their lead!

Now, I understand that Friedberger is now (and probably always was) operating within the realm of “offbeat, philosophical joke.” And that’s cool. Now we realize that part of his bitterness towards Beck (and Radiohead) has something to do with their wealth compared with his own. Fair enough. But the fact remains: Beck wrote an awesome song based on a stupid publicity stunt and gave it away for free. Matt Friedberger continues to contribute very little to a worthwhile conversation about anything. He’s actually annoying me enough that it’s hard for me to continue appreciating his music. So, I think I speak for the Internet as a whole when I say: “Matt Friedberger, shut the eff up already.”